This Healing Don't Whisper.

  I was having a terrible day. I was in a quiet mental spiral that day. I didn't want to respond to the dismissive energy that lured above me. I did as that energy reminded me how disappointment just keeps rotating in my atmosphere. And my father responded, “Well you haven’t been like this." Uhhhh, wrong answer sir. I have been like this. You would actually have to be willing to "see" me to know that I have been like this for years. I just happen to find the sense to keep pushing.  And that’s when it hit me again, how easy it is for people to overlook your pain just because you’ve gotten good at hiding it. I told him: No one cares, so I don’t speak on not being okay. I’ve had to teach myself to push through, to be “strong” because the support I needed never showed up. And still, people are shocked when I falter. The truth is, I’ve been unraveling silently. I thought I was making progress with my self-healing journey, and I have, but I am still human and those trigger...

I did what society told me to do.  Went to school. Got the degrees. Did the work. Not once. Not twice. I’ve reinvented myself more times than I can count. I followed the script, so why hasn’t the reward shown up? People are passing the bar. Getting into Med school. Making six figures in fields that made room for them. Good for them. That’s their journey. But why is mine always barricaded? I chose media because it’s been part of me for as long as I can remember. Sure, I’ve explored other interests, but why should I walk away from what’s deeply rooted in my soul? I’ve put in the work, reaching out to people locally, connecting with professionals in different areas, even traveling to Baltimore to meet with a news anchor, all while exploring various opportunities within the media world. So why the wall? Why does it feel like no matter how much I push, the world isn’t opening up? Why is my choice not as accessible? Don’t tell me “my time will come” and then in the same breath say “li...